2) so i watched oprah. she had Pam Grier. this woman is fabulous. unbelievably fabulous. and she said something about being a woman and being labeled as 'pretty'. she shied away from it because it is mostly a label she disassociates herself from because she was raised to view life and beauty in it's simple, natural substance. something comes from the inner and shines out which is what makes beauty. not the false projections of beauty sold by hollywood.
she also spoke of her time with Richard Pryor and his lifestyle with her inside of it. he was afraid of not being funny when he wasn't high or drunk so he kept on. after her visit to a gynecologist it became evident that her life was being put in danger by her association with him. when cocaine builds up in the prostate gland it is ejaculated through the penis during intercourse and that will endanger the woman's life. she told him he needed to wear protection which, did not go over well, as you can imagine. her response? "'Well, it's my life. You have to understand.' So I chose me."
3) this leads me to Ron's 'you choose him' line in DH. (yeah, weird transition but Potter consumes me. deal with it.) Hermione wasn't choosing Harry over Ron. she was choosing herself. her blood is the one being questioned. her legitimacy as a witch is being challenged. her body is the landscape upon which this war is waged. her war is Harry's war. she knows her worth. she knows her cost. she knows her right. she knows what this war is really about in the bigger and grander scheme of past, present and future and damn if this girl doesn't give her all to make it better for herself and those that came before and those that will follow. and FUCK IF THIS DOESN'T MAKE ME LOVE THIS GIRL EVEN MORE. when she decided to stay with Harry, she wasn't choosing him, she was choosing. herself.
i don't think Ron knew this. i don't think he was allowed to know this. (THANKS JOANNE!) my question becomes, does Harry know this? is he allowed to know this? help me out here people. i never read DH to its completion nor with much of a view to retain any plot or character. i'll probably never read that book even after the movies are over so... hit me with canon folks. *gasp* I KNOW! i'd like to offer with conjecture that Harry does become aware of this hence, his sacrifice, but that could be me projecting my fangirl shipper preference. and if it turns out that he is aware of this, then holy fucking monkey balls in hell, WHAT WERE YOU THINKING JOANNE?! WHAT?! WHY?! WHY WOULD YOU TOY WITH US LIKE THAT? YOU WILL OWN ALL MY CREYS BUT I WILL BE THE ONE PAYING FOR IT.