Fandom: Criminal Minds
Rating: The one that says some porn is in it
Warnings: Porn... kinda? We'll go with porn-ish
Spoilers: 6.01 The Longest Night and all those other eps that build character
Disclaimer: Belongs to other people who have more money... and also less brains FU!CBS
Summary: How can you NOT write something after this scene?
Am I right? Oh, poor Emily. Plus, I threw in some Garcia cos she's fun and bubbly and AWESOME.
A/N: Don't be kind. Feedback is more than welcome. I like it when people tell me I've screwed up. Thanks once again to njborba for the beta, cheering, pointing out stuff I didn't even see and the calming of neurosis. Also, you get a bonus song(s) because some fic should have soundtracks:
Shelter ~ The XX
Lifetime ~ Maxwell
x-posted like eh
Tethered and Tied
‘You know,’ Penelope accepted the bottle of beer Emily handed to her. ‘You didn’t have to make him detail my magical chariot.’ Prentiss sat on the step next to her. ‘I would’ve forgiven on the wash alone.’
‘And miss out on that gorgeous view,’ the profiler countered and tilted her own bottle indicating Morgan’s ass sticking up in the air as he was bent over vacuuming Esther’s seats and floor boards. ‘Come on, Peej.’
‘If there were a legal way to marry you both, I would.’
Emily laughed at the proposition. ‘Well, that’s one way to give Warren Jeffs a run for his money. At least we’d be smoking hot and sexy.’
‘Indeed,’ she brought their bottles together in salute.
‘Of course,’ Prentiss continued absent mindedly. ‘We’d also be the most emotionally screwed up polygamy trio ever.’
Being suddenly drawn into Emily’s underlying mood of pessimism took Garcia by surprise, but only just. She saw well, more heard, the strain that the Flynn case had taken on her comrades.
‘Are you guys okay,’ she worriedly inquired.
Emily shot Penelope a wry grin. ‘We’re okay,’ she sighed. ‘I just... he’s never been that far away from me before.’ She took a long pull from her frosty bottle then began picking at the label corners.
Finding herself as Emily’s confidant when it came to all things Derek Morgan gave her a sense of something she thought lost. It was as if Karma decided hunting down creeps who tore families apart should be rewarded with a unique little family of their own. May the wrath of many gods look down upon any who attempted to rip them away from her or cause them to doubt the bonds holding them together.
Noticing there was obviously more weighing on her friend’s mind Penelope allowed her silent concerns for them both to fill the pause. Emily continued to watch Derek progress with his tasks, but it was less about appreciating his display of physicality and more about proving for a certainty he was really there. It was almost as if she were assuring herself that he wouldn’t disappear. Garcia was sure there was some sort of profiling method Emily was employing and that would be in violation of the No Inter-Profiling the Team rule.
‘Out with it,’ Penelope nearly shouted a moment before the silence became too unbearable.
At the subsequent lack of response to her prompting she could almost see the words tumbling around Emily’s head but she wasn’t allowing them to escape into the open. ‘As much as I love you darling, your whole scary internal compartmentalisation is totally unhealthy and will definitely cause ulcers or cancer or some other crazy disease where your body attacks itself. And then where would that leave me? I would be all alone in my X-Box weekends, left to defend Reach from the Covenant with only Reid on my squad. And God love him, but the boy could use some practice on his Generator Defence.’
‘I-I’m sorry Pen,’ Emily shook herself out of her reverie. ‘It’s just...’ she couldn’t quite connect her thoughts to her finer verbal skills. After a short sip from her beer she started. ‘I know what it’s like to feel that powerless when you’re confronted by your worst fear. You can go either way,’ she tore her helpless gaze off of Derek and directed it towards Garcia. ‘And I don’t know which way he’s leaning.’
She had gotten used to being the one to hang precariously over the abyss while Derek anchored her line. Now that their roles had been reversed she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to do the same for him. Having that much doubt stoked her ire but it was tempered by the more overwhelming dread that if she wasn’t capable enough to be his mainstay when cases like this hit too close, too deep, he’d never be the same.
His father’s tragic death became the impetus for the man he became. Despite everything he’d been through, he was that stalwart of eternal optimism standing fast. It was part of his unshakable belief that no matter how bad things got, there was always something good to be found. If he lost that and either by neglect or failure she did nothing to stop it, then she didn’t deserve to be with Derek in the first place. He needed better than she could give.
The desperation on her face stabbed at Garcia’s heart.
‘Oh my strange love,’ Penelope enveloped her with the warmest of embraces. ‘There is nothing more you can do for him that you haven’t already done.’ She pulled back to look Emily in the eye because some things needed to be said face to face. ‘I know you probably can’t see it because let’s face it, objectivity is not exactly easy to maintain when you spend most of your brain power thinking like psychopaths and other various crazies, but you are the only woman in the world who could possibly save Derek Morgan from himself. I mean seriously,’ she gestured back to the man in question just a few yards away. ‘Look at how you’ve got him wrapped around your finger. The man is detailing my vehicle for my very romantic, very free date with Kevin tonight at Citronelle because you wouldn’t accept his pithy phone apology to me for projecting some displaced PTSD. Somehow, and I will refrain from making any lewd suggestions, you have worked your way past his defences in shorter time than it takes for an acre of rainforest to reclaim its territory. You, dear Emily Prentiss, are strong like an Amazon. Never doubt that fact.’
That earned her a genuine smile and a small flush of colour.
Emily eyed her suspiciously. ‘Are you sure you’ve never taken the profiling classes?’
‘Honey, don’t you know, profilers are the easiest people in the world to read.’
~ * ~
Sex wasn’t exactly part of the Save Derek from Himself campaign that she and Penelope had launched from her stoop earlier that afternoon, but if her body could offer comfort, she was willing to give. At the very least she knew it was better than rising to a confrontation where they could inflict more damage with hurling insults and carefully intonated words just because one of them was looking for a fight. It wouldn’t be fair and she wouldn’t let him use work as an excuse to drive a wedge between them. If there was going to be a divide it would be there because they weren’t working hard enough to keep it together. Besides, seeing the look of awe and reverence in Derek’s lust dilated eyes as she rode him until he came was far more satisfying than any reaction from a well placed barb.
‘You didn’t...’ he began to say with a trembling voice into the crook of her neck. Before he could finish she kissed him quiet. She didn’t want him thinking it wasn’t good for her. A blow to his sexual ego was the last thing he needed to compound his already bruised state of mind. This was supposed to be helping, not adding to the difficulty. The heat of his body pressed up against hers was all she needed from him. She needed to make sure that he was whole and together and present. She hoped all of that would translate to him in her kiss.
‘Oh, come on now,’ he managed to get out as she moved her lips away from his to explore the structure of his jaw and the tendons of his neck. ‘You know that’s not fair.’
‘What,’ she whispered heavily into his ear and contracted herself around him extracting a groan from deep within. ‘You’re not afraid of going another round are you?’
Once he recovered he was able to begin exploratory kisses of his own. ‘You don’t think I don’t know what’s going on? I saw you and Miss Thang conspiring earlier while I was busting my ass in the hot sun.’
Maybe it was good to allow him the latitude of thinking all this was some bet she had with Garcia over whose man was more satisfied at the end of the night’s activities. She decided to let him believe whatever scenario he had conjured in his head and needle him on. There was no reason to let him in on her true intentions, not yet anyway.
‘And did your super hearing tune in to the gritty details of this nefarious plan, Kal-El?’
‘No,’ he chuckled. ‘But I am part of an elite team that studies behaviour and interprets body language. And you,’ he nibbled at one of her earlobes and whispered as heavily into her ear as she did his. ‘Have a tell.’
‘I do not,’ she began to protest in her surprise, but he had already taken the advantage and flipped them over.
‘You see unlike most people, who twitch and squirm when they have something to hide,’ he brushed the strands of hair that had become tacky with sweat away from her face. ‘You become as still as the waters of a lake during the moments just before sunrise.’
Emily opened her mouth to further her protests, yet the same disconnect from her thoughts to her voice occurred.
With a slightly boastful grin Derek lingered above her. She was caught and had no other recourse but to concede. Damn him. What exactly was she supposed to say?
Hey babe, you can’t go off the rails like that because I don’t know if I’m strong enough to handle it if we both let the job drive us crazy.
‘Emily,’ his triumphant grin had dissolved into apprehension at her silence. ‘Are you here?’
Getting lost in her thoughts was becoming a dangerous pattern. Part of the Save Derek from Himself plan included learning not to withdraw into her own process where she tried to solve the problems of the world by herself. That sort of method to life had no place on a team and there was even less room for it in a relationship.
‘I am,’ she reassured him with a soft kiss.
‘What is it,’ tenderly he whispered. ‘Just tell me.’
‘You scared me,’ her mouth went dry suddenly. ‘...with the Flynn case and Ellie,’ she was hesitant about going down this path but knew that if she soldiered on they would both end up in a better place. ‘You’ve always been there for me, whether I knew it or not and when I tried to do the same for you it just felt, like maybe I didn’t do enough.’
Derek began to piece together a lot of what transpired over the day; Garcia’s car wash and detail job, Emily booking an expensive table in one of Georgetown’s premier French restaurants with complimentary valet and meal for Penelope. He also thought having Kevin meet Garcia at Emily’s apartment with the veiled reason that it was ‘closer to Citronelle and just over the Key Bridge’ was suspicious. And the way she had just made love to him clicked everything into place. Now that he saw all the strings being pulled lead back to her worry for him, he realised some of his past still held sway over his present. That didn’t sit well with him. He was the master of his fate, not some cataclysmic trauma from his childhood. Protecting himself from the damage this job could have on their being took an extraordinary amount of effort. Now that he and Emily intertwined their lives to such a large extent he became conscious of the need include her in that safe haven.
‘I ever tell you about this,’ he rearranged himself to show her the ink on his left arm.
Emily shook her head.
‘My father’s name was Stanley. Stanley Morgan, like the wide receiver for the Pats. I guess that’s why I got into football. I thought if my father could see me play ball and I made it to the big time, I‘d finally be a man he could be proud of,’ the absurd notion of that recollection shifted his mouth into a lopsided grin. ‘Then I blew out my knee and there was that other choice staring back at me. The one I had been trying to avoid. I didn’t wanna end up like my dad, laying my life down for some stranger that would probably never appreciate it.’
‘What changed your mind?’
‘Something he told me when he was teaching me how to swim. I was terrified. Every time the water got up to my neck I couldn’t breathe. So he gave me a hug and asked why I was scared and I told him about a barbeque my mother took us to at my auntie’s house. One of my cousins said he’d show me how to swim and he threw me into the deep end of the pool. Sarah had to save me.’
Emily tried to contain the horror she felt.
‘He said, ‘Don’t let anyone or anything intimidate you.’ I asked him what that word meant and he said it meant not letting anything, including myself, scare me so bad that it stopped me from doing what I needed to do.’
‘Stanley was a smart man,’ she said admiringly as she outlined the edges of his tattoo.
‘Yeah he was,’ Derek smiled. ‘And I’m sorry if I scared you,’ he sincerely apologised. ‘When we’re out there doing our job, I like to make sure the people we help aren’t strangers so when I do put my life on the line, it’s never in vain. I got lost on this one, but you have to know you are everything to me and by just being there, you are always more than enough to bring me back,’ he kissed her palm and brought her hand to rest over his heart.
‘Well,’ she beamed up at him. ‘That’s good to hear.’
She was relieved he found a little peace within himself and it somehow galvanised her confidence in their relationship. Emily thanked whatever fates or mercies that gifted her with the ability to hold it all together for the both of them.
‘Good,’ he let out quietly. ‘So now that we’re okay,’ he leaned in closer. ‘There’s some unfinished business I have to take care of.’
Derek kissed her with all that he left unsaid and she gave back in kind. And now that they were on a level playing field, she allowed herself to be caught up in his attentions.